Sunday, February 6, 2011


Today was Jason and I's last Sunday at our church. These are my thoughts about the future:

When I met Jason, I was sixteen years old. Jason and I were friends, and I considered him a good friend but never looked at him as anything more. If someone had told me at sixteen that in a couple years I would be dating Jason, I never would have believed it! Now here we are seven years later about to get married. Sometimes I look back and think, how did we get to here from there? I know exactly how… God. When I was sixteen and focused on a bunch of stuff that wasn’t important, God was leading me here. God knew that Jason was the one for me way back then. It amazes me! Psalm 139:16 “Your eyes saw my unformed body; all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be.” God knew everything that would happen to me up until this very moment, and He knows everything single thing that will happen to me from this moment on. Who am I to try and control anything in my life? God can see the big picture. God says in Isaiah 55:9 “As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.” I will never be able to fully understand God or His plans. But isn’t that the point? There isn’t much need for faith or trust if we know the plan, know exactly what will happen. God is the one who knows and can see how all things work together. Romans 8:28 “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.” And God is the one holding all things together. Colossians 1:17 “He is before all things, and in Him all things hold together.”

A lot of things are changing. After much prayer and consideration, Jason and I have decided to step down from youth ministry. This is a scary step. I have so much peace about it, and I know we are making the right decision. We are doing what God is calling us to do. And sometimes that is a scary step to take. Why is it scary? We don’t know where we will be led next. To me the unknown is always the scariest place. It is also scary to me because in less than four months we will be married and neither of us is employed. It is scary to think that neither of us will have a job when we finally become husband and wife. However, as scary as it all is, I take great comfort in the fact that God has already been where we are going. He knows exactly what will happen and exactly where we will end up. He loves us more than we could ever ask or imagine. John 3:16 “For God so loved the world that he gave his only son, that whoever believes in him will not perish but have everlasting life.” He has a plan for us, a plan that has been set since the very beginning of creation. If there is anything I have learned while Jason and I have been together it is that God is our provider. He has NEVER let us down, and He NEVER will. Matthew 6:26 “Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they?”

 I know that God has taught me this valuable lesson because I have changed as a result. I am a worry wart. I worry about anything and everything. But as scary as this step Jason and I are taking is, I am not worried. I have a peace about it that only God can give. Philippians 4:7 “And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” I know that no matter what God is in control and no matter what my circumstances may be He is holy, loving, graceful, merciful, faithful, and trustworthy. “All of my life, in every season, You are still God. I have a reason to sing, I have a reason to worship!”

 I am so thankful for all God has done for me and is still doing in my life. I pray that I will fall more and more in love with Him daily. I am so thankful the God I serve is able to do immeasurably more than I could ever ask or imagine! Ephesians 3:16-21 “I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the Lord’s holy people, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge- that you may be filled with the fullness of God. Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be the glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen.” God, I look forward with eager anticipation to all that you have planned for Jason and me.

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